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There is truly no absolute aid for the heartbreak that comes after losing someone so dear. Grieving is part of it, and mourners should take all the time they need to grieve. However, losing a loved one is part of life and, at some point, must be accepted.
Moving on is indeed a difficult stage, but there are practices that can help one do so, cope up with the difficult situation and, eventually, heal.
1. Acknowledge the pain and allow yourself to grieve.
There are people who are usually in denial during the first stage of a loss. You may see them as if they are doing well in handling the situation, but the truth is, they are hiding the pain. Later on, letting go will be harder because their emotions were suppressed when they had the chance to grieve. Acknowledging the pain is the first step to healing. One must understand that it is okay to grieve and he does not need to mask his emotions.
Articulate how you feel, ask for help and get support. Many mourners fear that they may burden others by opening up how they feel, but the truth is, the people who really cared about you would love to be with you not only in your sunny days, but much so in your rainy days. Also, venting out to a trusted person creates deeper bonds. It gives an assurance and comfort that when your friend, partner, or relative also needs someone to talk to, he knows you will be there for him.
Work out, eat nutritious food—but also take some breaks and eat your favorite food, and try to be present at work, at school, or whatever community you belong; that means being engaged to those communities. As much as possible, do not take too much time staying inside your room. Go out and have a good amount of sunlight! Doing so, combined with productivity, releases happy hormones.
Taking a break from grieving once in a while can really help. Do something that you usually enjoy doing like watching a movie, shopping, playing your favorite sport or game, reading a book, going to a spa—whatever it is that you will make you feel relaxed.
5. Have something that represents your departed loved one.
It could be a picture, a gift that was given to you by that person, or if he was cremated, it could be a keepsake jewellery or jewellery made from ashes. A keepsake jewellery can be memorial rings, ashes in pendants, among others. A part of your loved one in the form of ashes, are infused in these beautiful pieces. Having these can help you feel much closer to that person because you can carry these around with you. It is also a beautiful reminder of the love, care, and memories you have shared together.
6. Be thankful.
Reminisce the beautiful times and laugh at the funny moments you shared with this person. Although it is painful to let go, acknowledging the impact of this person and being thankful that he was part of your life can give you peace and will help you gain a new perspective on the situation.
7. Get your inspiration from your loved one.
Keep a journal, write a poem, make a painting, compose a song—make something creative that is inspired by this departed loved one. Pouring your soul and expressing your emotions through these outlets are creative, productive, and healthy for you. Dedicate what you do to your loved one because in that way, you will find meaning and inspiration to go on with life.
Although losing someone so dear is heartbreaking, it is not the end of everything. There is a reason why unfortunate events happen. Finding that out can help you heal from your pain; and gaining a new perspective can give more meaning to your existence. Remember to always be hopeful because that is what your loved one also wants for you.
