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A NECKLACE TO PUT ASHES IN HELPS YOU INTERACT WITH KIDS TODAY

The way kids get their information before is different from what they have today. They believe things are coming from other parts of the world through the internet, unlike what we used to have when we were little. They quickly get hurt and grief for other people they see on the internet. It can also stir up their emotions. If kids today are given a necklace to put ashes in and explain why you are giving it, they can easily understand what you mean and will question no more. 


At the same time, we need to be careful about what things we are telling them. Kids today are intelligent, and they can adapt to new things quickly. That goes the same with their emotions. They easily get hurt and feel sad. And some of them are good at hiding what they feel, especially when they don't want anyone to feel sorry for them. 


Even young children today are already good at hiding their emotions from their parents. It is because of the influence of hours they spend online. Thus, it affects how they see life and how they react to the natural events in life. And as adults, we need to guide them still and ask what they need from us or things that we can help them with. 


Understanding kids' emotions is demanding today, especially when they are sad because of grief. Some of them don't talk about their grief to their parents or any family members. Instead, they talk about it with their friends and seek advice from them. They need belongingness and comfort from people outside the family that is also hurt by the loss. 


As adults, we need to understand that they need help and comfort as we want for ourselves. Many online people can talk about their pain, but nothing beats physical talk with those who care and love them. You observed your child or some of the youngsters in your family with their behaviour and coping with pain. 

 

 

Never trust their silence.



Even if they tell you that they are okay and are silent about what they feel, there are emotions that they have been hiding. They don't want to let anyone see that they are weak and want to make sure that they are strong from the outside. Young people these days are more likely to pretend that they are strong even if they are already hurting.


They want to show us that they can be independent and they can handle themselves. They don't need supervision and comfort because they are no longer a kid, they are adults who can make decisions for themselves. But in reality, they need us to help them make decisions and give some advice in life. 


That is why you need to talk to them and interact with them to easily open up the emotions they have been hiding after losing their loved ones. They need a little push to speak about their pain, and once they see that they can confide with you, they will indeed talk about it. 

 

 

Don't try to level your understanding and emotions to them. 

 

    We all grieve differently. That is why you don't need to compare what you feel to theirs. Their understanding is not as deep as you think. Even if they live in an era where the emotional quotient is high, we need to understand that understanding and feelings are different. It would help if you considered knowing who you are talking to, especially with age. 


    It would help if you spoke words that they can quickly grasp and won't confuse them. If you feel they explain what happened and their feelings, you need to consider their age to describe them adequately. It would help if you were sensitive about what they feel and how they absorb the loss.

     

     

    Limit Screen time for them. 

     

      The more screen time for the youngsters, the more it will stir up their emotions. There are contents in social media that can trigger things and can affect their current feelings. You can't monitor them every second. That is, you need to limit their screen time. 


      Engage them in a conversation with you. You can ask them how they feel about the passing of your loved ones and how they are coping with it. Please encourage them to be more open about what they think to understand them more, so you will meet halfway about it. 

       

       

      Spend more time with them.

       

      If possible, spend a lot of time with them. You can spend a week of vacation after the burial of your loved ones. It will help you discourage them from using their mobile phones. Involve them in physical activities that they can learn. 


      Invite some of their friends to come along so they will not get bored. When their friends are around, they can be more active and be inspired to move away from the online world. And appreciate things around them. They can relax. That goes for you too. It would be best if you had some time off from stress and pain. You all deserve it.