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DAUGTHER’S RING MADE FROM ASHES FOR HER DADDY

He is a husband, a father, and a son. That's how you describe a man who's already married. But for a girl, he is her daddy. He is the first man who loves her imperfections. But he's already gone, and no one would tell her these things. All she has left is a ring made from ashes of her father.



She longs for the first man who wipes her tears away whenever she falls. The first man told her that she is beautiful and she outsmarts everyone in his eyes. She misses the days where she could run towards him whenever she comes, and warm kisses and hugs will welcome her.


Those are the days that she keeps in her memory. The treasure that no other things can compare. She has the ring made from the ashes of her father to comfort her. It is her confidence whenever she is nervous. And a clear vision in her blurry days. 


In the days to come, she will look for his presence at home. She will dial his phone number to ask where he is but will stop because she realizes no daddy will answer the phone. Days will become months, but she still longs for her first prince charming. It is hard for her to let go, but she is making a way to survive it. 


Her smiles are no longer the same. She smiles to cover up the pain and loneliness. It is no longer the smile she sets that lightens up the whole space when she is around. She feels like the light loses its energy to brighten the night. That is why she is dull and gloomy. 


When she comes home, she is either mad at simple things and will have a mixture of emotions. At night, she cries her heart out until she can hardly breathe. You will know that she cries all night because she will have;


  • Stuffy nose
  • Swollen eyes
  • She doesn't have the energy to get up from bed.
  • Lazy
  • Headaches

She is doing these to relieve herself from missing her daddy, the man who loves her the most. At times, she will go back to the places where she could remember her dad's routine or favorite things and stay there for a couple of hours. She will also listen to her dad's favorite music and stare at the ring to remind her that daddy never left. She is in her heart. 


She may go to the beach alone to find peace of mind. And shout all the things she wanted to tell her daddy before he left. You may see her screaming her lungs out in the water. But never judge her. It is her way of releasing her sadness.  


People will crowd her out with questions about how she's been and how she is coping up. But she can't answer those questions because she doesn't know how she has been since her daddy was gone. She acted so strongly in front of her mom to make sure she would not worry. She is also grieving and doesn't want to add to any of her grief. 


If you see her, don't try to comfort her with words that she already knows. Listen to her. Allow her to rant, to shout, and scream. She doesn't want any comforting words right now. She wants a person who will never ask her questions and go through to all the sympathetic statements. 


She needs a friend who is willing to listen to her, hug her and allow her to cry over and over again until she can't cry no more. Be that friend that she needs. She knows she is a mess, but she wants to fix herself. Never allow her to go through this alone. 


You know that there are no words that will suffice her heartaches and anger towards what happened. But guide her in fixing herself. She can't confide in her mother right now because she thinks she needs time for herself. Let her realize that she needs to be with her mother at this moment without forcing her. 


Allow her to realize that the person she often neglects inside the house is the person she needs to move on from grieving. She needs her mother to understand her because they go through the same situation. It is nice to have someone who you can talk with regarding how you feel. And that she has people behind her willing to listen to her. 


She needs understanding, realization, and acceptance to move on with this phase of her life. It may take a while before she can let go, but don't leave her. For in life, you will only trust people who know you better than yourself, and sometimes they are the ones we neglect the most. We forget to value and thank them for being there for us.