The life of children helps them develop their social interaction and perception of the world. Thus, it is also the essential years of a person because they can discover things first hand. It is also where the parent-children relationship is built. But when parents passed away and were no longer around to nurture them. Children can have a memorial ring that represents their parents.
They can no longer have the best time of their life with their parents. But if you are their aunt, uncle, or grandparents, you can help them fill up the mis\sing days they are longing to have. You can help them create new memories that they can treasure for the rest of their lives. Helping to be the person they will be in the future.
As a relative, you are to guide them. If the child lost their parents later on in their childhood years, you might explain to them that you will be the one who will raise them. Explain to them that you will help them fulfill the dreams their parents have for them. But before you can help them with their growth as individuals, you need to help them overcome the pain of losing parents.
They don't know that they are grieving. What children can describe to you is that they are sad and miss their parents. You can create activities that will help them forget what happened, especially after their parent's burial. Even though you are grieving yourself, you know that the child needs much more attention than anyone else. If the child is within the age of five (5) to nine (9) years old, you can have these activities that will divert their attention;
Children at this age need activities that will help them develop their social interaction with other people. It is also a way for you to get close to them. With these activities, you can get to know them better and vice versa. You can create a relationship that will help them open up with you and remove the awkwardness to say anything that bothers them.
If the child is still an infant, they don't know what is happening around them. But they will cry because they will ask for their mother's milk, and they will look at the mother's scent. You can have one of their mother's clothes brought home with you to keep them calm at night when you are putting them to sleep. There is also a challenge in feeding if the child is still breastfeeding with their mother, but you can look for formula and feed them.
It would be best if you also prepared yourself to take care of them. There will be a bit of adjustment for you and the child about this situation. You will have to adjust your time and everyday routine with them. Especially when you live alone, but if you are determined to take care of them, you will pass this adjustment period.
But since both of you are grieving for the lost loved ones, you may comfort each other. You can talk to them. You can speak to the infant about how you feel. They may not be able to respond correctly. But they understand how you think and will make a gesture that will comfort you. Talking to an older kid will be different; you need to ask them how they feel about the loss and the current situation.
You can wait for their response before you give yours, so you will know what words you need to say to them. Since they have the memorial ring with them, let them know that they can talk to their parents through the memorial ring and understand that wearing the ring will help them feel their parents' love. But you need to explain to them about the memorial ring because they might misunderstand its meaning.
Inform them that whenever they see the ring, they will be reminded that their parents never left them—but staying in their hearts for the rest of their lives. But we still need to be careful in explaining to them since children nowadays are intrusive and have a wild imagination. They might get different meanings because of the words we say to them. It would be best if you let them know the value of the memorial ring so they can take care of them.
As for you who are also mourning the loss of a loved one, either your sister or brother, you need to take care of yourself first before taking care of the people you value. You need to know the boundaries you can give to them and understand what you are capable of providing. And your love and efforts in taking responsibility for these children are appreciated. Thank you.