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When a man loses his child, he loses half of who he is. He lost the opportunity to hug and kiss his offspring. Even if he is a man, he also needs comfort from his wife. He needs support even though both of them are hurting. As a wife, you need to be by his side while you both go through the process of grieving. You can give each other gifts like a men's pendant with your child's remains, and he can provide memorial jewellery too.
It would help if you made sure that both of you are healing at the same time. You need to assure each other that you will be there for each other no matter what happens. There is no greater joy if you see your spouse overcoming the pain he is going through, and you are there to support him. It can be challenging and rough, but you need to have faith and hope for it to work.
Loving a man means you need to love all of him, too—all his flaws and uncertainties in life. You also love all the scare he has inside his heart, including the pain of losing your child. It would help if you let him know he is not alone in this battle and that both of you will go through this together.
Grieving is the most challenging process of accepting that people we love will no longer be around. Both of you need to heal, that is understandable, and he knows that too. But he also needs time to accept things as a father and as a husband. The support you give is the strength he needs to survive, and in the same energy, he gives you whenever you feel weak, dealing with all the emotions you have inside.
You will only know a man if you already have seen both of who he is. Since he is hurting, don't stop him from crying. Let him pour out the emotions that he has been hiding from other people. Make him feel comfortable without any hesitation and being afraid to be judged.
A man's vulnerability is their weakness. They don't want others to see it because it might destroy the empire they are building inside them, their pride. He will only show this other side of him to you because he knows he can trust you, and you are his wife. So, allow him to express what he feels so you can understand and help him overcome it.
When you feel that he is drifting out because he thinks that he has no use and value. Make him believe that you need him more than anything and anyone in the world. Women are more open about what they feel. They can express what they think to other people, but men have these hesitations in mind about telling how they think, especially if it talks about vulnerability.
As he assures you that everything will be okay, you want him to be by your side while battling the pain. In that way, it is easier for both of you to know how to comfort and help each other. As other people say, marriage is not done only by one person, but it takes two people to make it work. That is why both of you are each other's support system.
Even if both of you are working, you need to have time for each other. If you are already doing that, you have to spend more of it to help each other. Spending time together means creating new memories. It would help if you had that because of the loss you had experienced.
You can travel to the beaches or do mountain climbing if both of you like extreme sports. It is your way of relaxing and drifting your attention from pain. For as long as you have each other, you can make it. It is also the best time to discover more of him, or the both of you.
As the saying goes, it takes two to tango. You need to support each other even though both of you are grieving the loss of your child. Your husband needs you as you need him in this phase of your life. Men do not easily express pain. It would help if you heard him without saying any word. It would help if you observed too. His grief is your grief, too, so you need to be there for him like he is for you.
In this test of life, you need to strengthen your bond as a couple and make sure that it is strong enough so any storm will not quickly destroy it, and hurricane life will be given. The road might be bumpy along the way, but you need to make sure you stick to each other and will never let it break you.
